10 Ways to Damage a Friendship

Would you like to improve your relationships in the new year? If so, here are ten “relationship breakers” you should avoid.

1. Don’t return phone calls.

2. Don’t reply to text messages.

3. Don’t take a genuine interest in your friend by asking questions about his/her life, but instead monopolize conversations by talking solely about your own life and interests.

4. Don’t contact your friend when he/she is going through a major life transition or problem and could use your support (a miscarriage, surgery, career struggles, a move, troubles with children, divorce, etc.).

5. Communicate primarily through impersonal means of communication (e.g. Facebook, Twitter, text messages, e-mail). This problem is particularly exacerbated when your friend is going through one of the transitions or struggles mentioned above.

6. Don’t be vulnerable by sharing your own struggles and problems, but instead pretend that your life is perfect.

7. “One-up” your friend by letting her/him know that whatever good news she/he has experienced, you’ve experienced something better.

8. Stay out of touch for an extended period of time.

9. Say you’re going to do something, but don’t (e.g. come visit from out of town, help with a move, show up to a party).

10. Don’t provide honest feedback.

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